Hope.

I finally understand what it means to be guiltless and bitterless (Thank you, Nick). I finally know what it means to EXPERIENCE both grace and truth simultaneously (Thank you, Nate). I finally understand what it means to see brokenness as a blessing (Thank you, King David)... and I better understand how deep grace can go (Thank you, Jesus). I am without defense. I've done so much wrong in the past few months too. I am a depraved and incapable sinner.. capable of ALL sins under the sun. I am capable of murder, lying, adultery, hatred, bitterness, etc. Thankfully... there's hope. And it comes in the shape of grace's restoring power (Thank you, Brisben).

I'm thankful for everything. Even the pain I feel now (Thank you, Dane... for helping me see it like that). I'm much more genuine due to the ringer my decisions have put me through. I experience forgiveness at a whole new level and also ask for it with a deeper need for restoration. I'm still suspect to my sins blindness, but thats okay. Christ prevails in being my advocate and revealing to me my areas of darkness. I've had a lot of what I call "haters"... but Christ did too. And he said, "Forgive them for they know not what they do."...--- Christ loved even them.

I want to love like that. I want to forgive like that. I want to experience grace like that. Father, let my brother Jesus' payment cleanse me with your Spirit. I'm broken and putrid. Thank you for having grace. I need no other advocate. I don't need a stupid "HOPE" sign on my wall as I try to drink my sorrow away. I can experience it with simply washing my dishes with love (Thank you, Jason). Or forgiving someone who wronged me (Thank you, Mindy). Or humbling myself in forgiveness by receptively responding to the cleanse of grace through truth. I've drank, I've cried, I've trusted in just about any vice attainable with my personality. The hope that is now visible stains the memories of my failures clearly on my beloved Saviors hands and motivates me to strive forward in obedience.

In moving forward, I want to say I'm sorry... to anyone hurt by my decisions. I would also like to claim that Christ's light pushes me to seek NEW meanings to grace, love, truth, hope, passion, identity, brokenness and ANY OTHER blog titles I've done before this. God, break me when I'm stuck in my sin and let it strengthen me towards endurance (Thank you, Paul). Have pity on my soul (Thank you, Augustine). Let grace never remain cheap (Thank you, Bonhoeffer) Ladies and gents... I say God is good all the time but... Just know its been redefined. It's time to get violent with my sin (Thank you, Piper).

P.S. Thank you God for all individuals mentioned throughout... You are good.