Empathy - The intellectual identification with or vicarious experiencing of the feelings, thoughts or attitudes of another; the power of understanding and imaginatively entering into another persons feelings.
When I was going through my divorce I began to really dive in to the Psalms of David. Definitely was searching for something to ease the soul, despite the circumstances. To be honest, diving into those Psalms at the time was the reason I even started this blog... Felt like it was a good place to seek vulnerability, peace, redemption, repentance and authenticity.
When I told the pastor who then was trying to walk me through the separation process that I was continuously diving into the Psalms he gave me an incredibly harsh remark. He said: Why dive into the Psalms? You're not seeking to be with God. You're seeking the easy path. Why don't you dive in to Romans, which is full of conviction and the need to restore relationship with God? You just wanna hear good things that make you feel better.
Everything inside of me wants to reveal the name of this particular pastor. Mostly because he preaches at a church with the word "GRACE" written on every wall. I wish I could have responded to his input then but I simply didn't have right words to. My world was crashing, it was largely my fault, I felt I had no where to run, had to resign from my youth director position, was making no money, had a pile of bills, was losing "christian friends" to the debacle, etc. It was definitely a gruesome time. It goes without saying that I handled a lot of that entire situation poorly as well.
If I could give him my two cents today, I would tell that pastor this: You're a fool. David was viciously open about his failures and approached God with a broken heart. It's a clear example of how we should abide in the Lord through all circumstances. It's why he was called a "man after Gods own heart" in the first place. This abusive suggestion for Romans reveals your need to control grace but let me remind you that you aren't God. And let me express my thankfulness that you are not... Because God is a gracious, loving and patient God...
...I guess I'm thinking about all of this at 6:30 in the morning because I'm being reminded of the real power of empathy... And how it coincides with the power of healing. How important these two things are for being in intimate relationship with others... If we don't empathize, how then do we live outside ourselves and how do we help an aching world without understanding where its hurting? If we don't heal, how then are we to understand others without continuously thinking about whats aching in our own hearts?
See I can't judge the pastor. Like me, he's a victim of only thinking from his own perspective without attempting to set aside his own pains to effectively aid another. I guess my heart this morning is seeking healing from pain for improved empathy towards others because when you think about it... empathy is the most precious gift one can offer another human being. Its our willingness to put ourselves DIRECTLY in front of the arrows coming at another person and feeling as they feel. It's a deep, powerful and intimate connection. hah... Come to think of it, it's exactly what Christ did for the beloved on the cross.
Pray this blesses you this morning.
