Acceptance.

Life forms a repetitive circle. Let's call it God's way of restoring a world once created perfectly. The process goes: Creation, Fall, Redemption, Consummation. Through every life experience-- failure and triumph --this process is active. And through God's empowerment, we are given the ability to witness it...  Often times, we miss it though. Either way, the redeemed experience all four continuously in a circle throughout life. This is often referred to as the process of sanctification.

I was created to be an extension of His glory but because of my fall and love of sin, which affected both my flesh and soul, I now echo the same cry of depravity as this world. However, I was created in the image of God. And my redemption comes only after my repentance and full surrender to He who created me... who yearns for me. His desire for me is a cathartic, cleansing love that refines me past my fallenness and likens me to my beautiful Savior... (Random sidenote: Sounds like a water purifier?)

All who hear him are covered. All who hear him WILL listen. None of this is possible, however, without the continual and relentless pursuance of acceptance (or as some call it "surrender to His will"). And acceptance can only happen after we have fully realized the gravity of our condition and the insecurities we secretly carry and cater to by being insecure (also known as repentance). In this moment of realization-- which many call "seeing God's love" and others call "realizing the fear-worthiness of Gods power" and others call "God's grace" and others call "God's holy truth" (let's just agree to call it a "Experiencing God") --Only one thing becomes apparent: God is beautiful. I am not. and Here is my most recent moment of acceptance to complete His most recent cycle of "creation, fall, redemption, consummation" for me in what is my most up-to-date insecurities...

In March of this past year, after living in a deeply rooted sinful state, I became revealed and in the process reaped the consequences that bore fruit from my failures. I often struggled against those who attempted to help me, and continuously fed my oppressors and defenders reasons to doubt me. I now sit here 9 months later humbled, remorseful, FULLY repentant and acceptant. And it's time to haul ass back to the foot of the cross because He's been calling my name this entire time and I have pridefully ignored him. I have approached him only in anger and resentment and I have treated his people without the same grace I had been asking for. I need him, have always needed him and will continuously need him. I Use to say that "God is good" all the time and...

Nothings changed. God is STILL good.. It was just redefined for me through that one repetitive circle.